Frequently Asked Questions
1) After all of these years, are you guys still open?
Answer: Well, what do you think?
2) Why did you guys move from Chauncey Hill Mall to West Stadium Avenue?
Answer: Excellent question. We moved because Chauncey Hill Mall is slated for redevelopment (at some point), because having them build around us would have been an expensive architectural nightmare, because a wrecking ball would have ended up cluttering our clothing aisle, and because taking the Chauncey location and pushing it somewhere else was easier said than done (sorry Patrick, we tried).
3) Why is it called the Discount Den?
Answer: According to Merriam-Webster, a “discount” is a reduction made from the gross amount or value of something (such as a reduction made from a regular or list price), the act or practice of discounting, and/or a deduction taken or allowance made. Meanwhile, ol’ Merriam defines “den” as the lair of a wild usually predatory animal, a comfortable usually secluded room, a subdivision of a Cub Scout pack made up of two or more boys, and/or (as a British term) a small structure built by children as a place to play, hide, or provide shelter. On second thought, calling ourselves the “Deduction Lair” has a pretty interesting ring to it.
4) How do you guys pick your time frames for Free Pop Friday?
Short Answer: A combination of Ψ(x,t) = Ae^i(kx−ωt) and xn+1 = f(xn).
Less Short Answer: We use a proprietary algorithm that blends together the Time Dependent Schrödinger Wave Equation and Chaos Theory. The math can get a little intricate which is why it takes us about a week between each Free Pop Friday, but it’s not as complex as it sounds.
5) What’s with the controversy surrounding the “Warning!!” sign that’s been on our front door for over 20 years?
What the Sign Says: “Warning!! The Den is staffed and operated by a bunch of foul-mouthed, liberal college students. Some of our conversations, music and merchandise may be unsuitable for children and right-winged conservatives. It’s not our intention to offend you, but there’s a [Darn] Good chance we might! Enter at your own risk!!”
Our Official Response: “The Discount Den is your friendly (and sarcastic ) neighborhood convenience store that’s been serving the Greater Lafayette Community since 1982. As we have for decades, we welcome anyone and everyone from all walks of life, especially those with any trace of a sense of humor. For those that have been offended by the warning sign that’s been on our front door since approximately the late 90s, we would like to first thank you for at least visiting our front doorstep, and secondly, would like to direct you back to the sign where it states, “It’s not our intention to offend you, but there is a [Darn] Good chance we might…Enter at your own risk.” If you decide to take that risk, please enjoy our world famous Den Pop. If you are still offended, we also conveniently sell all the supplies one might need to stage a full protest. We would, however, recommend that such a protest takes place during a “Free Pop Friday” when you may quench your protest-induced thirst with a free Den Pop.”
6) What is a “Den Dime” account and how do I create one?
Answer: This is part of our super secret master plan to outpace and take over Amazon (don’t tell Jeff) which currently offers this nonsensical “Prime” thing with “moderately faster” shipping (you got us there Jeff) and other “somewhat useless” features for an exorbitant annual fee. The Den Dime account, on the other hand, is tremendously better since you receive your order in a reasonable amount of time without having to pay an outrageously high annual fee and without a bunch of your data being unknowingly collected and used against you later on (at least for now) to sell you other random knicknacks you probably don’t need.
You can create an account in a matter of seconds by clicking on the silhouette of the person (between the search icon and the shopping cart icon) at the top of this page (bottom left on mobile devices) and selecting “Create account.” By doing so, this will save you some precious time at checkout and allow you to receive exclusive discounts during future promotions. Does Jeff and his “Prime” nonsense give you special discounts? Not like the Deduction Lair does.
Still not convinced you need a Den Dime account? Easy - do the math. If the standard checkout process takes an average of 5 minutes to enter in and double check all of your shipping information, and if the Den Dime account can bring that average checkout time down to a single minute, and if you made a million individual purchases/checkouts through our online store, then we just saved you an average of 4 million minutes. Unbelievable. Mind blown. Imagine what you could accomplish with an extra 4 million minutes. You’re welcome.
7) What is this “Reusable Den Pop Cup Design Contest” thing I might have heard about at some point?
The idea of creating a reusable Den Pop cup is an idea that has been growing on us throughout our lengthy and legendary history. However, as part of our highly anticipated 151 Years of Small Steps Campaign, we are pleased to announce this green, new deal: a contest that invites Purdue students to submit a cup design that could be selected for print on our reusable cups and become part of a collectible piece of Purdue tradition.
But why host such a contest? Glad you asked. Our world is in peril, and we can no longer stand the terrible destruction plaguing our planet. Our original idea was to send five magic rings (representing Earth, Fire, Wind, Water, and Heart) to five special young people (from Africa, North America, the Soviet Union, Asia, and South America) that, when combined, the five powers would summon Earth’s greatest champion…but that idea was apparently already attempted back in 1990. The overall goal of this so-called “Planeteer” group was still commendable - take pollution down to zero - but we kind of went in the complete opposite direction of that over the last 30 years or so.
Any whom. If interested, the power is yours and you can submit your Den Pop cup design by emailing your design to marketing@thedenpop.com.
8) How large is the Giant Den Pop?
Very large. More specifically, the Giant Den Pop can fit 5,632 ounces (44 gallons) or about 176 of our regular 32 ounce Den Pops. It stands about 3 ft tall and weighs about 15 lbs. With the straw (reusable of course) included, it stands about 5 ft tall and weighs about 25 lbs. That’s a lot to drink up.
While Giant Den Pops aren’t technically available for regular purchase in store, we are not opposed to constructing more Giant Den Pops on a build-to-order basis for some of our die-hard Den Pop fans. However, due to the variety of materials, strenuous labor, and creative magic involved in producing such an obscenely large drinking vessel, the price for one of these Giant Den Pops is considerably higher than the other sizes commonly available in store. If you are still interested in acquiring a Giant Den Pop (pop sold separately*) of your own for whatever reason, please contact us here.
9) Are all of these really frequently asked questions?
Not really. Most of them are never asked and the rest are only commonly asked.